How to Nail Your Wedding Vows (& Your Wedding Film)
Writing your wedding vows can be challenging for even the most eloquent of wordsmiths. There is a lot riding on saying the right thing. Add to that the pressure of public speaking & it’s easy to see why some people struggle with this part of planning a wedding.
But don’t despair! With the right guidance it can be a really enjoyable experience. After all, you are professing your love for the most important person in your life, in front of your most cherished family & friends. What’s not to love about that!
When it comes to your wedding film, there are a few ways in which you can help us to get the best results. Here are our top tips for nailing your wedding vows.
Make A Date Out Of It
You are probably crazy busy & stressed out of your mind in the lead up to your wedding. Not only that but your every conversation or activity is centered around wedding planning. This is your new normal. You might not even remember life before wedding planning at this point.
This can typically lead to a little writers block in the vows department. So put aside a night to sit down together, have a glass of wine & start going through your old photos. Reminisce all the fond memories that pop up along the way. Write down all your hopes & dreams for your future as a couple.
Once you have those creative juices flowing, you will be in a good place to start putting your vows together separately.
What Is Legally Required?
The legal wording of the ceremony is as follows –
“I ask the people here present to witness that I, (name) take you (name) to be my lawful wedded wife/husband”;
Once you have this part out of the way it’s up to you both to decide the rest of your vows. This is sometimes where you might hit a road block. You can literally say anything… so what is good/right/normal?
Firstly take the pressure off yourself! It’s 2020. There is no such thing as ‘normal’! Your vows should be authentic & heartfelt, so just speak your truth.
What Do You Love Most About Your Partner?
The key to really nailing your wedding vows is keeping it concise & sweet. Opening with a few short points about what you love most about your partner is a beautiful way to start. Write down the top 10 things you love about your partner, then try to narrow it down to 4 or 5 key points.
Whilst it’s completely acceptable to tell jokes or poke fun at your partner here, also remember this is your opportunity to make them realise how much they mean to you. The perfect ratio is roughly 70-80% sentiment & 20-30% light humor. If you really want to roast each other, your reception speeches are open game.
e.g ‘I love your cheeky smile, your infectious laugh & the way you hold my hand at night when we are falling asleep’
Tell A Story
Telling a short story about your partner is a great way to engage your guests. Whether it be the first time you met, your first kiss or something totally random, it can be cute, comical or both! How did you know your partner was ‘the one’?
e.g ‘I remember the first time I laid eyes on you I knew you were my forever’
What Impact Has Your Partner Had On Your Life?
Did they change your life for the better? How do they make you smile every day? What do they do for you that makes you love them so?
e.g ‘You opened my heart & showed me the true meaning of love & for that I will be forever grateful’
What Do You Promise?
What will you do (or continue to do) for your partner once you are married? How do you ‘vow’ to better your partners life in the future?
e.g ‘I promise to tell you I love you to the moon & back every day for the rest of our days’
What Are You Looking Forward To?
Where do you see yourself in the future? What are you looking forward to in 10, 20, 30 years time with your partner?
e.g ‘I look forward to traveling the globe together & having thousands of marvelous adventures. You are my best friend & I can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives together’
Compare Your Word Count
Arguably one of the hardest parts about writing your vows is that you can’t even ask the person you trust most in the world for advice.
Deciding on a structure together in the beginning can be helpful to at least know that you will both be on the same track with your vows. Whilst still allowing you both the freedom to speak from the heart & be completely authentic with your words.
The easiest way to compare what you’ve written without spoiling the surprise, is to simply cross check your word count. This will ensure that you are both speaking for roughly the same amount of time & that this part of the ceremony will be perfectly balanced.
Depending on the length of your chosen wedding film, this part of your video might be anywhere from 2-4 minutes.
Read Your Vows Yourself (Don’t Repeat Them)
Sometimes couples opt to have their celebrant read their vows into their ear & then repeat them into the microphone. The idea is that you can maintain eye contact with your partner throughout the ceremony & we get the appeal.
Unfortunately for your wedding video, it just looks strange having your celebrant standing next to you whispering in your ear the whole time. You also run the risk of the audio overlapping as we normally would cut the celebrant audio out to avoid repetition. This is not necessarily something that can be fixed easily in the edit.
We prefer for couples to read their vows themselves whilst the celebrant stands off to the side. This allows for greater intimacy between the two of you during the most important part of the ceremony. Just remember to look up at each other once in a while.
Ask Your Officiant For Their Expertise
We always say that a good officiant is worth their weight in gold. Whether you are having a religious, alternative or classic ceremony, your chosen officiant will likely be full of useful tips when it comes to structuring your vows.
Don’t be afraid to lean on them for advice. Remember they do this stuff every day & they have probably seen it all over the course of their career. If you end up stuck or in doubt just ask!
Pro Tips For Your Wedding Video
We love overlaying the audio from your vows throughout your wedding film, so it’s important to us to capture them clearly. We have likely hidden microphones all around you & also plugged into a direct feed from your officiant’s microphone. Here are our top tips to nailing your vows for your wedding film –
+ Speak clearly & confidently into the microphone provided by your officiant.
+ If you fumble a word don’t stress, just start from the beginning of the sentence & let editing take care of the rest!
+Read your vows, don’t repeat them! As mentioned above it just flows better!
+Look at each other, not the crowd or your officiant. Let the crowd melt away, the only thing that matters is the two of you.
+ Let yourself feel your emotions. It’s an important moment, live your best life!
+ Have Fun! You are surrounded by the people that love you more than anything in the world. Relax, be yourself, have fun & enjoy it!
Here are a few of our favourite resources for foolproof wedding vows